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How To Take The Stress Out Of Networking

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A couple of weeks ago I interviewed Gary Morgan and Jeremy Snell on How To Get Corporate Clients for my monthly Webcast. Both Gary and Jeremy have built impressive client lists in less than 2 years and have thriving training businesses. I asked them ‘What is the biggest piece of advice you would give freelance trainers just starting out’? and the answer was  ‘Network,  network,  network’.

The next day I received an email from someone who had listened in to the Webcast.  She explained that she could see what we were saying but she hated networking, felt really uncomfortable walking into a room full of strangers and felt they were all trying to sell her stuff anyway! She felt that networking was just not for her.

If you feel like this too – and there are many freelance trainers that do, remember that networking does not have to be like this. There are many other ways you can meet and build relationships with other people without feeling stressed.

Making 1 phone call a day to one of your contacts, no agenda, just having a general catch up is networking.

Spending 30 minutes a day on Twitter engaging in conversation is networking.

Having a coffee with a different person once a week is networking. This may well be someone you have been tweeting with who you’d like to meet face to face.

Connecting 2 people who live near each other or who have complimentary businesses is networking.

Commenting on someone’s blog post and following up with an email or phone call is networking.

And I could go on …..

All of these activities don’t involve the stress and pressure of formal networking events yet they still produce the same results. And much more fun too!

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13 Comments

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  • Andi Roberts

    Great points. As a huge Introvert I shy away from networking events. I like the ideas here, especially the coffee once a week. This I am adding to my list. I would add though that generally non of this leads to instant success and so trainers should be prepared mentally and economically for the lag between networking and sales.
    Thanks Sharon!

  • Nicky Kriel

    Great advice, Sharon. It is so easy to forget that networking is not just going into a room with multiple people. I know a trainer who met an ex-colleague for coffee just to keep in touch and walked away with 18 days worth of business.

  • Jaimie Dobson

    Nice post with some good networking tips. Especially like the “Commenting on Someone’s Blog” point.

  • Phil O'Brien

    Hi Sharon. Really nice perspective on Networking. I recently wrote a post on my blog called “I HATE Networking”.

    http://personalnetwork.wordpress.com/2011/01/27/i-hate-networking/

    After reading your post, maybe I should change it to “I HATE standing like a lemon at networking events” – as I’m very happy doing all the other things that you suggest. And you are right – they are much more fun too!

  • Alan Donegan

    Thakns for the blog Sharon, it is good to be remind sometimes that networking and sales is not just about cold calling and hard selling, it is about the relationship and can be built up in many ways.

    Excellent blog!

    Alan
    http://www.enjoypresenting.co.uk

  • Haroon Rashid

    Very nice post on Networking. There seems to be a misconception that Networking is only in person at a formal event, but I think you hit the nail on the head.

    Excellent post!

  • Chris Markiewicz

    Sharon

    Very good piece which very much echoes my own views. As a trainer who happens to have a visual impairment, formal networking events can leave me feeling pretty much stressed. With no peripheral vision, there is risk of not seeing people, bumping into them and even knocking drinks/sausage rolls out of their hands – not the best of first impressions! A white cane helps, but can leave others feeling gauche – unfairly!

    So, online and phone is a great alternative which works. I’m delighted to say that I have already had a couple of nice “sniffs” of work off the back of very modest use (so far) of Twitter and LinkedIn.

    I also think the term “networking” can put people off – as if it is a contrived and manipulative activity. I like to think about it as simply having conversations. That feels more comfy to me and therefore motivates me more to do it. THis may be helpful to others?

    Cheers
    Chris

  • Sharon Gaskin

    Thanks for all your comments so far, seems like this post has really struck a chord!

    Sharon

  • Jason Cobine

    Great post. So much that a business does is marketing – even if they don’t know it. The same applies to people within a business. They’re networking yet don’t know it. Nearly every time someone is talking about someone else’s business they could be talking about yours.

    As long as you’re helping people they have the chance to help you.

    @jasoncobine
    http://www.beyondnetworking.co.uk/networkers-help-their-friends/

  • Ann Hawkins

    This just shows how the most natural thing in the world – connecting with other people – has been hijacked by ‘professional’ networkers who have invented a set of rules in order to make money.
    I strongly suggest not playing by other people’s rules. If you are expected to pay to go to a networking event, request an attendance list before you go and if the organisers won’t provide one, don’t go, and tell them why. If enough people did this the organisers would soon get the message.
    When you get the list, connect with people on line or ask for an introduction to the people you really want to meet.

    We’re all told not to sell at networking events and then forced to give a sales pitch as an introduction – it makes no sense at all so don’t do an elevator pitch. No-one listens anyway, they’re all too busy thinking of what they’re going to say or bored stupid by hearing the same stuff every week.

    We all connect with people based on shared interests, education, location, books, music, cinema etc., and all the things that ‘normal’ people talk about when they meet outside of the artificial business networking arena so ask questions and find out who people are rather than what they do.
    In fact, NEVER ask anyone what they do and if someone asks you, tell them that’s something they’ll find out as they get to know you.

    Those who take the time to get to know you are probably your kind of people.

    Networking, i.e. making connections is a natural thing for human beings to do so don’t let the networking police stop you from being less than human by imposing a false set of rules on you.

  • Melissa Kidd

    As a once reluctant networker, who would stand in the corner by the pot plant and hope someone would talk to me at events – I’ve written some tips aimed at helping other reluctant networkers here:

    http://www.coachingcreatives.co.uk/2011/08/10-top-tips-for-networking-know-how/

  • Gavin Scott

    A great post here Sharon with some interesting comments, I particularly like Ann’s reply which made me smile. I’ve recently been testing out a new technique at Networking events that really helps to a get good conversation flowing. Just imagine for one second all of the people who you see at networking events who are busy looking at their mobile phones! Can you picture it?? Well, I’ve started to approach these people and used an opening line similar to, “I’ve just got a new mobile phone myself, what phone do you have?” This simple but effective opening line is then usually followed by a good healthy conversation, providing you with a great opportunity to really start to get to know the person. Try it!! You will be pleasantly surprised and more often than not, thanked for initiating the conversation.

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